Thursday, February 14, 2013

Doubt...

As you may or may not be aware, I have made it my life's work to decipher the true lessons behind the historical circumstances surrounding one of the most important and auspicious events in the history of mankind. I, of course, refer to the perilous journey that Dorothy Gail suffered for us all. Her travails through the yet-unexplained portal into which she was hurled these many years ago, should still give us pause in consideration of life as we know it.
Many pundits have attempted to explain not only the event, but the true meaning behind it over the past few decades, but few if any have spent more time and effort than I in these pursuits.  So it is with an incredible sadness that I feel I must address the unthinkable slander that some have seen fit to sling at this seminal adventure in our history.  Those that do not believe that the event took place as described, fly in the face of the validity of mountains of evidence proving these Holy events to be factual accounts.  It is unthinkable to most, I know. To doubt our most cherished lessons in life. But as the Great Oz himself(Praise Be His Name) implored: "Oh ye of little faith".  For that is what, I feel, is behind this recent onslaught of defamation. Lack of faith. Faith in The Great Oz himself; faith in Dorothy...and yes, even Toto too. It breaks the heart. It shakes the very foundation of our conviction toward magic itself.
 
I understand that to even acknowledge this incredulity on the part of those that cast doubt upon our connection to the spiritual and mystical land of Oz, is tantamount to blasphemy itself.  That which the Tin Man so wisely warned us against. However, I cannot, by my silence allow this evil to go unchecked. This type of destructive recalcitrance must be exposed for what it is. Evil spawned of the Wicked Witch of the North herself.  You know of her evil plots. You that have been taught in the ways of Oz are all too familiar with her machinations.
 As our leaders that so wisely affirmed in the Kansas II reform of the Church of Oz, we now understand that the Dark Sister was not killed in the sense that we understand death, and lives on in a zombie-like presence to tempt we believers. She still wields her balls of fire and jitterbugs...we all know this.  And yet, I say, even this recent reluctance to accept the very sacred word of our Saviouress Dorothy(PBHN)...is nothing more than this sorceress' subtle and evil meddling.  The greatest trick that she ever performed was making some believe that she died a watery death.


Doubt that The Cowardly Lion led the world toward the path of courage.

Doubt that The Scarecrow eschewed ignorance of Pythagoras. 

Doubt that The Tin Man longed for and received a human heart.

Doubt that our Lordess Dorothy traveled that perilous yellow road for all of us.

Doubt these principles my friends...and you doubt life itself.  Doubt that these events actually happened as told in our Holy Book, and you have succumbed to the West's baneful woes.
  

6 comments:

Dr. Armand Skagerak Frederikshavn said...

I came across this horiffic specimen of Oz-ical revisionism some time ago, but never dreamt I'd find the appropriate forum in which to discuss it.

"Transported to a surreal landscape, a young girl kills the first person she meets, and then teams up with three strangers to kill again"

It sickens me to think there are those who would cast doubt on the original cinematic version of events, when the proof lies in how many theater screens it's played out on over the years.

Timster said...

Dr. - How true and sad. These non-believers...
Only through study of the Holy Scriptures can the strong-minded among us understand that even the Great Oz himself sanctioned these "killings", which of course exonerated our Saviouress of any wrong-doing. It is all there in the book...and as you point out...the film version.

kikz said...

scripture reveals Glinda the Good haled from the South...

glengear said...

One again you have taken away the childhoold fantasies with which we were brought up with. Are you also telling me the Norman Rockwell paintings never depicted our interpretations of reality?
It's a good thing I'm an old man or, or, or, [SNORING].

Timster said...

Kikz - Praise be her name. The Book of Glinda is among my favorites. It helps me in times of stress...

Timster said...

Glenster - Fantasy?!?!?!